I'm laying on my couch. It's 3:44 AM, and I've just finished texting back and forth with someone who I used to be close with. Basically, the gist of the conversation was that she did not want to be friends anymore. Awesome. I'm going through an incredibly difficult time right now, every single day is a struggle. And everyone I know wants to distance themself from me. I need more, they want less. Why? I try so hard to be the best person I can be. It's worthless. I feel like I have no one to turn to. I can't be myself. Because no one wants the real me around. They want the fake me. Because the people that see me without the walls up, apparently would rather they didn't. I feel hollow. Empty. I wake up every day and wish to God there's a text from that special someone. But there isn't. I haven't asked her to hang out. I didn't even text her for 3 days. I'm pretty sure she didn't even notice, and if she did, she was thankful. I can't shake this feeling of anger at the world. Angry at her for turning her back on my everything. And acting like it doesn't bother her a bit, while it kills me inside. Angry at my "friend" that doesn't want to be bothered with me. Angry that I have no one. Everyday I think about just leaving, going somewhere and starting over. And I know nobody would care for more than a day or two. I am so miserable. And I don't know if there's anything that can fix it. Ever. I'm numb. Finished. I have no hope. I have no desire to do anything anymore. Figure I can do that one last favor for anyone.